Apparently, the strategy I came up with last time when writing about this topic works somewhat (Why invite depression for a chat when not depressed?) – that strategy is simply not freaking out (anymore, for the 5,000,000 time) about the repetitive and unavoidable. At least it seems that when darker episodes come ... they come … Continue reading Depression teaches on the nature of the mind. (Philosophy and pseudo-Buddhism from craziness.)
There is no point in rushing oblivion Rushing forgetfulness. The imprint stays stuck in your heart for a while For a reason. An ember, a dried-up stick, half burnt. What's it still doing there, immobile. Seemingly useless. . I think sometimes If it's been thrown in under the right star sign It becomes a crystallisation … Continue reading Axis
Personal stories in the context of #TakeTheMaskOff – hiding and camouflaging autism spectrum traits for so-called social acceptability. How I did it, why and how I'm doing it less, results. . Accusations of authenticity I've been accused by a friend, a while ago, of always trying to be completely authentic. Even in situations in which … Continue reading Autistic masking and authenticity. #TakeTheMaskOff
/*this is a mild article on trauma related to cultural alienation from the perspective of someone whose migration experiences weren't dramatic or violent thank God, so no trigger warnings. Brief and non-graphic mention of a friend's refugee camp story*/ This morning found myself looking at the signup information for a professional course in trauma therapy … Continue reading Language and trauma
After a very happy time (during which I usually don't bother to write 🙂 ) followed by a short, sudden, abrupt, and fairly visceral episode of depression that lasted just a few days, I came up with the project of writing about depression while my head is above the water – to write an article … Continue reading Why invite depression for a chat when not depressed?
[continued from Ships & lighthouses after interruption and a bit random] * If loss is delusion because possession is delusion (at least of some abstract "things" like time) ... what about the abrasiveness of interpersonal pain? The jarring headache of mismatch, miscommunication, my old friend the glass wall (whether it's autism, depression, emigration, queerness or … Continue reading Interpersonal pain, Frankl’s dread of ageing, and Momo
Shattering shapes of a rigid shell In the end it is nothing more than that To make room for the flow Which is moister, closer to the ground. More humble, unassuming, which hugs the Earth. Knowing how to break fluently And dispose of the scaffolding of thought and plan Quickly To partake in the quicksilver … Continue reading Normalising heartbreak, handling the water.
I crossed this border once again. The mythic border, across the river in the mist in the mornings, heading towards the sunrise, when i was a very small child. it's ingrained in my brain, perception and heart even though there is no border here anymore. Even the Syrians can apparently pass. No one controlled me. … Continue reading Iron Curtain 2018. (Wherein I cross my childhood border and revisit spiritual remnants of the Berlin wall.)
You've left me to the wolves. You didn't even know they exist, or that you were doing it. They are far more terrifying than anything you have ever seen. If you had seen them, i would know that by the marks on your soul. I saw more than you. . You didnt see the bright … Continue reading A cryptic and paradoxical text on soul reintegration