On Pete Walker's book about Complex PTSD, the Fawn response to emotional neglect, how sensitive we are and how confusing mind-reading can become the habitual response to confronting humans.
Another post on how to cope with intuitive gifts (or liabilities) that come without a manual, or when your inner life apparently isn't only *your* inner life. Trauma-informed and psychologically literate, non-esoteric perspective.
This article is written from the perspective of people who randomly experience things like "sensing presences" and some types of out-of-body experiences, in addition to intuitive coincidences and sometimes the whole range of depersonalisation phenomena – explicitly not from the perspective of people who actively seek this kind of thing and/or project hopes of awesome powers … Continue reading How to cope with your intuitive gifts?
Being me for me always implies some degree of being you. My nature doesn't come with built-in walls and noise cancellation and convenient, numb dampening. It must be comfortable to be cushioned, exposed largely only to your own thoughts. I can do that if i am alone in the forest. Or if i live very … Continue reading Being you
This sound gesture is about maintaining my voice, in the face of car noise, birds and people outside the window. Interference. . https://soundcloud.com/sasha-supertramp/voice . All my life, it has been extremely hard – if not impossible – to hear, notice, feel myself when thrown into the tumble drier (or, more a washing machine) with all … Continue reading Finding and maintaining a voice … in music and life (incl. improvised piano audio track)
This post has a soundtrack, me asking a bunch of questions on the piano. https://soundcloud.com/sasha-supertramp/questions . Can you hear the questions? - space to guess what the main question was - . Somehow I've been dwelling in nonverbal land, still there. Emotions, sounds, sights, shapes, colours, feelings, patterns, rhythms, movements, metamorphoses. Waiting for the periodic … Continue reading Can you hear the questions? (in today’s piano improv soundtrack)
I can't stand "reading" music, I can't stand sheet music, I can't stand music lessons. You too? I can't play by ear too well either, can't sing on pitch and sometimes find it hard to tune a guitar (I can hear two tones are different, which the heck is higher?). But I still love producing … Continue reading How to learn the piano by feel: grey day meditation. (Improvisation.)
I've been planning to write a post about solitude, loneliness and isolation for a while. Is solitude good or bad? Everyone thinks it's bad. And I'm crazy I got myself into it. Then why the heck did I get myself into it? Is hiding yourself away in the country for months without having a face-to-face … Continue reading How to walk the tightrope between social burnout and agonising isolation?