Patriotic madonna #1

I was contemplating doing a copy of the Black Madonna of Częstochowa icon today.  The dark icon I remember from childhood in my beloved grandmother's bedroom, and which is in fact to be found in every authentic Polish grandmother's bedroom. The somber beauty of the original painting (marked by the scars which have a story) is  … Continue reading Patriotic madonna #1



to K. For some of us it is really hard to incarnate. The world of structure, the world of ideas,  both logic and aesthetics are safer than the world of that which is inchoate, and does not speak in any human tongue.  It is the human, the bedrock of the human. (Although philosophers think words … Continue reading Incarnation

Ruining zen sketches on Dec 5

I frequently like my sketches much better than my finished paintings.  As mentioned in the previous post, I often prefer not to finish anything because my feeling is that adding more stuff will inevitably ruin it.  An example is provided below.  I enjoyed looking at this, vague landscape sketch. Leaving room for imagination. Pushed myself … Continue reading Ruining zen sketches on Dec 5

The fine art of fruitful complaining

On a butoh retreat with many crazy artists in Italy, a Hungarian colleague remarked to me that I'm probably the most negative person he knows – I skilfully find something to complain about in any situation. He said he'd spent time in Poland (my patriotic fatherland) at one point and noticed that Polish people in … Continue reading The fine art of fruitful complaining

Sensitivity is strength

I've just once again thought of changing the name of my blog. For one, not living up to it. For another, kind of a pretentious title.  Something absurd and witty perhaps.  Then a few days ago, I bumped into an article on "being too sensitive" on In the context of black people's emotional reactions to … Continue reading Sensitivity is strength

Human, just more so

Having recently talked to an autism educator (at and educated myself otherwise on the matter, I learnt that my current life situation seems to be quite the aspie classic: three degrees, three failed PhDs, no job, no house (residence in 6 countries and counting), constant background anxiety and and bouts of depression devolving the … Continue reading Human, just more so